July 31st was the day I seriously started suspecting that my late period was not “just stress” as I had been claiming for a week. I intended to wait for the following morning (even though I have never been ready for a baby, every time I get a negative test I get a little sad), but when I took my boyfriend in to work that afternoon I grabbed a couple tests and by the time I got home I couldn’t help myself.
I peed, I tested.
As soon as the bright pink washed over the result panel and the control line showed up, I assumed that was the end. That was the farthest I had ever gotten before, anyway.
I stood up, washed my hands, and as I was drying them I looked down and saw another faint, pink line appearing. I squinted to be sure my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me. I got dizzy, I grabbed the wall, I tried to scream but nothing would come out.
I immediately pulled out my phone to call my mother. I paced around my apartment waiting for her answer. When she answered I was out of breath, hyperventilating. I told her what happened and she was alarmed, but excited. She reassured me that there was no reason to panic. It was too late to undo it and things would be fine.
Eventually I calmed down. I wanted to wait to tell my boyfriend until after he got home, but at about 6pm I got a text saying that his friends wanted to go out tonight and asked if I thought it might be fun. I had to tell him then. He wasn’t exactly shocked. He knew it was a possibility. I was a week late, I was sick and exhausted all the time, I was crying at the drop of a hat, and my boobs were sore and swollen.
I’m slowly informing everyone of importance about the impending fetus. My ultrasound is scheduled for the 29th of this month (the wait is killing me). Now that I’m coming to terms with everything, but am still confused and googling like a maniac, I figured that maybe I should start one of the blogs that I’ve been so desperately looking for. So here I will update you all about what it’s like to be 21, vegan, and pregnant.